Natural Weight Loss Resources

Dear Friends,

Yesterday I was talking to my coach about how much I enjoyed eating out at this Thai place (I actually had grouper in coconut curry sauce with white rice and I ordered sticky sweet rice with mango to go).   So to eat white rice is not my idea of healthy eating, and it was all cooked.  Even though, I really savored and enjoyed the food!  That sticky rice was the best, and I ate only half of it later on that night and saved the rest for the next day.  What a treat and I had no guilt.

I’ve been eating mostly raw, and I can really set high standards for myself.  I know eating raw food is the best way to go for me, but I tend to be overzealous in my opinions about other foods.  Not only do I discriminate against highly processed, greasy, sugary foods which I don’t eat, I am overly critical of anything not raw.  When I don’t eat raw, I eat healthy cooked food.  I would have opted for brown rice over white if they’d had it.  But they didn’t and so I adjusted. 

I tend to expend a lot of energy thinking about my food choices.  Lately I’ve experimented with making raw desserts made from raw nuts, cacao, dates, agave nectar, fruit, etc.  They are so delicious that I feel like I should feel guilty for eating them.  In fact, I feel like having one in the evening. 

Do you ever feel like rewarding yourself at night at the end of a long day with food?  Well, I do that.  I’m not overeating, but still….there’s that voice that says you don’t really need to eat that and it’s probably keeping you overweight…shame on you, Angie.  I’m eating more for pleasure than pain avoidance.  I don’t necessarily think this is “bad,” but I do not welcome the associated guilt. 

So what am I doing about it?  In my next article I go into more depth and explain how I’m handling it and how this ties in with my body image.  They are definitely related. 

Peace & Blessings,

Angie Monko, 314-422-6520

PS: If you’re really serious about doing something different about your weight and body image issues, see the attached qualifying form. http://www.harmonyharbor.com/qual.html

PSS: Do you have friends and family that are also interested in creating their own destinies of joy and freedom? Send them to www.harmonyharbor.com. 

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Hello Friends,

To learn the mechanics of Meridian Tapping, go to my website, www.harmonyharbor.comand click on icon on the left called EFT  Weight Loss Program. 

Being overweight and eating excess food (or restricting food) is really not about the food.   Please take a few minutes to honestly answer the following questions.

1)      How long have you been over- or under-eating?

2)      Who else in your family is overweight or severely restricts his/her food?

3)      What happened the last time you reached your goal weight? (any specific event)?

4)      What emotions are you trying to tranquilize or avoid with food by being stuffed or restricting?

5)      What loss/emptiness are you trying to fill with extra food (or lack of)?

6)      What would you focus on if you didn’t obsess about food anymore?

7)      How would you spend your time if you didn’t eat compulsively anymore?

8)      What is the downside of losing weight (or gaining if that is what you need)?

9)      What is the upside of remaining overweight (or very thin)?

10)  I would rather have this pain than to ____________________.

11)  I have to  _____________ in order to _______________ (be perfect in order to be loved), (have money in order to feel safe), (be independent and not rely on others in order to be okay), etc.

Our eating issues are related to various emotional themes, and until we can clear certain blocks, we will not be able to have emotional freedom around food.  For example, if I took away your favorite food forever, how would you feel:  deprived, abandoned, lost, lonely/empty, anxious, guilty, afraid or angry? Perhaps you’d feel a multitude of these emotions.

You can tap on the various energy meridian tapping points.  The idea is that all negative emotions are created by a disruption in the body’s energy system.  You start by reciting a setup phrase that normally ends with “I deeply and completely love and accept myself anyway:”

“Even though I feel deeply deprived…and I’m insatiable, I deeply and completely love and accept myself anyway.” 

“Even though I feel hurt about being abandoned…”

“Even though I’m profoundly afraid of…..”

“Even though I can’t stop feeling angry…”

Tapping helps to clear out disrupted energy.  By getting to the route cause or core issues of why you eat, and then tapping on it, you begin to move the body’s “stuck” energy.  After successfully tapping, when you think of things that might trigger you emotionally like childhood issues, traumas, phobias, fears, etc., you won’t respond in the same ineffective manner.  You will gain a new perspective on your core issue.  This seems miraculous, but this is how it works.  It often works where nothing else does because you get to the reason you feel deprived or abandoned or angry….and then you heal that part of you. 

This is how I begin the process with someone who is ready to begin the healing process.  Just ask yourself if you’ve had enough pain and are ready to move forward.  How would it feel to be rid of emotions and body image issues that have held you back your entire life? It’s pretty empowering compared to how I lived my own life for about 33 years.

Peace & Blessings,

Angie Monko, 314-422-6520

PS:  If you’re really serious about doing something different about your weight and body image issues, see the attached qualifying form. http://www.harmonyharbor.com/qual.html

 PSS:  Do you have friends and family that are also interested in creating their own destinies of joy and freedom?  Send them to www.harmonyharbor.com.

Dear Fellow Seekers,

Do you obsess over food or body image?  Do you constantly think about food and what your next meal will be or even the next few days of meals?  Do you fantasize about eating out at your special restaurants and the pleasure certain foods will bring you?  Do you despise your body, certain body parts, stretch marks, imperfections?

You look in the mirror and perhaps see a pregnant thermometer, if you have thin legs and in your mind a gigantic stomach?  Maybe you’re only a few pounds overweight, but it seems like 100.  Your thoughts seem out of proportion compared to reality.  These are obsessive thoughts.

You don’t necessarily ACT on them, but they sure do zap a lot of your energy, don’t they?  More than you realize….

And these thoughts allow you to continue the internal picture you have of yourself, that you’re fat and ugly and worthless, even though others know this to be false.  What matters the most is what’s going on inside of your head.  You could have 100 people tell you how beautiful you are, but if this opinion doesn’t match your inner beliefs about yourself, you’re not buying it—ever!

When you start acting on your obsessive thoughts, you are acting compulsively.  I know from my own experience this feels like a “letting go,” but not a good letting go.

For example, you’re on a diet.  You’ve been depriving yourself for days, and life seems boring, anxious and unfair without your comfort foods.  You’re sick of salads and resolutions and white knuckling it with the food.  This feels like torture.  You see a big piece of your favorite cake with icing (a lot of icing!).  You know you shouldn’t indulge because you’ll feel even worse afterwards.  You decide to “let go” anyway.  You’ve made a decision or choice that almost seems like it’s being made for you.  It’s that strong of a compulsion.

After you eat the cake, you say “What the hell?”  I’ve screwed up and I might as well eat the whole cake and then something salty too.  So the binge begins.  Next, the self-loathing sets in.  You’ve lost even more confidence in your ability to eat food like a normal person.  The cycle of dieting starts again—deprivation and letting go.  Sound familiar? 

Don’t fret even though this may sound hopeless.  There is a solution!  Stay tuned for the next blog about why diets don’t work and what that solution is.

Peace & Blessings,

Angie Monko

Hello fellow seekers,

I hope this day finds you well.  If you’re struggling with food and body image issues, it’s hard to predict how your moods might swing from day to day.   Typically a weight problem is NOT about the food.  The excess food you eat (or the lack of it if you’re an under-eater) is a symptom.  The real question you have to ask yourself is WHY you try to control your food, and what does food do for you? 

My eating problem started long before I was overweight.  I remember that I started using food to comfort me as a small child.  My Dad physically and mentally abused my Mom which really stressed me out as a kid.  The tension was always worse at night when my Dad was around (note that I am not blaming my Dad–our relationship is now fine).  So I would eat food, especially junk food like chips and dip, and life seemed more tolerable.

I also realize that one of my triggers is to overeat at night.  I think it might have to do with my childhood, and I see eating a little larger portions at dinner compared to my other meals as a reward for working all day.  It helps to comfort me and to feel safe and relaxed.

Can you relate to this?  What this tells me is that I need food to feel safe in the world.   At an early age (maybe from the time I was born), I saw my protector (Dad) harm my other protector (Mom).  If I didn’t feel safe in my household, I certainly wouldn’t feel safe “out there” in the big world. 

So I turned to food for safety and comfort.  Problem is—the food only provided a false sense of safety.  It did serve a very useful purpose though—to help me cope and survive when I didn’t have a better way.  Therefore, I’m not going to criticize and berate myself for using food to cope with life because I did the best I could at the time.  I was only a child with limited resources and tools.

To this day, food is still important to me.  I enjoy preparing and eating it.  However, I don’t use it as a crutch to avoid life or my feelings.  My hope is that we can all learn to rely on our inner strength and wisdom and less on the food.  We can begin to create our destiny and let go of limiting beliefs and fears.  I know we can do this!  I hope you are starting to feel the slightest glimmer of hope…

Peace & Blessings,

Angie Monko

I think that my automatic response to a big to-do list is stress.  Even though I’ve made peace a high priority, I sometimes get frustrated at how easily I slip into the old familiar habit of feeling overwhelmed.  I can be of no use to anyone at this point.  Further the feeling that I am being cornered or put into a pressure cooker does nothing to induce my creative juices.   I want to blame my busy schedule and feel justified that I don’t feel at ease with my world.  Even the thought of giving up stress stresses me out.  Somehow my ego, which tries feverishly to protect the status quo, has me convinced that I’m a victim and always will be.  Who am I to break out of this box of mediocrity? 

When the uncomfortable feelings get to be too much, I want to turn to food for comfort.  Food is a great comforter after all.  The problem is that if I abuse food and assign all sorts of guilty associations to it, my body and mind and spirit will rebel.  I may suffer ill health, relationship difficulties, scarcity, etc. 

The good news is that as I persist in believing in myself, more on some days than others, the loud critical voice gets quieter. This makes room for my wiser Self to speak more clearly.  I can also use emotional freedom technique or tapping to aid in the transition of inner change.  I’ve been afraid of change, just like you.  I try to think of change as a means of releasing something that already exists in me.  There is a part of me that wants to express myself through my writing.   If I keep avoiding my feelings by stuffing them down with food,  I will never fully express all of who I am. 

So how do I change the stress pattern?  For starters, I can become aware of it and then decide to respond in a new way.  I can tap on my karate chop point and say, “Even though I typically respond to a big to-do list with overwhelm and stress, I now choose to be willing to release this pattern and respond with love and peace instead.” 

There may be trauma stuck in the body, and if so, I can tap on those specific events that caused the trauma to clear it out.  It is always my choice on how I respond to life’s circumstances.  To learn more about tapping, visit my website at www.harmonyharbor.com.  Here’s to your harmony!

Peace & Blessings,

Angie Monko

314-422-6520